last updated: 5/10/2025
October
A tough, if spiritual September.
The process of self sabotage is now self-sustaining. I have buried it beneath a facade of ‘minimalism’ or ‘life optimisation’ but the truth is I’m just afraid. Afraid and ashamed that I am no longer contributing to the beautiful fabric that is the world around me. My tank is empty, I’m running on the fumes of potential and creative possibility.
My photography is automatic. I will walk, I will seek and study the quality of light, because it brings me peace. Is that enough? Why do I feel compelled... obligated to make something of this ‘work’? Instagram was the relief valve to this feeling, but I have left the platform for now. Instead I will surrender my photos to this stream of self-indulgence and reflection, for no reason but to liberate them from my hard drives, and my conscience.
Please enjoy these photos, all from a single roll of colourplus, almost exclusively shot within a few blocks of my home.
September
Early this month I quit my job. Nothing specific caused this decision, it was a normal day where I simply found myself drained of all willpower. The quiet passenger in my mind decided to speak up and take the wheel. I no longer wish to be beholden to something as trivial as making money for an ignorant wealthy few.
Furthermore, I have had to admit to myself that I have been somewhat abusing my stimulants. I have been so focussed on numbing myself and squeezing every ounce of energy out of my mind, that I have lost sight of my true motivations, how can I be sure I want to do the things I want to do, if everything is the same level of tolerable.
This rambling is simply context for my daily walks around my neighbourhood. I’ve found them to be profoundly comforting and enlightening at times. It’s as if an unknown source of energy is woken up from within as soon as my muscles are activated, and my eyes subjected to the ever-novel quality of light around me.
There is no back up plan. This is the contingency. Can I endure whilst tending to my most basic of needs? Sunshine. Sleep. Exercise. Companionship. The latter being a subject for my more personal journalling.
I believe that by being my genuine self, sharing what I have, loving the world, the world will love me back, and I will learn how little I truly need to be happy.
May, 2025
some snaps from a trip to canberra for my cousin’s birthday with the most important women in my life.
HP5 +1
I like this format. A single roll at a time, per post.
A marvellous yield of moments.
A long weekend in Melbourne for mum’s birthday.
A beach day in La Perouse, and a trip to view Cao Fei’s “my city is yours”
I recommend the foam pit.
Finally a selection from the shoot with Sean, previously seen on my last M/F roll.
29/3/23
5 of 10 shots from an old roll of tmax
Started on a walk through the secret garden in lavender bay with Rach. I spun too hard on one of those rotor things at the playground and got a headache... or maybe i was just really thirsty. thirty.
Man walking in front of the bridge/boats was first. I can’t imagine how pleasant it must have been to have a garden like this - it once belonged to Mr. Whiteley.
The writing on the handrail would make a good name for a book, or a band. In any case, what a beautifully succinct piece of graffiti.
Last few frames were comissioned by my dear friend, Sean Dwyer, for his upcoming solo EP. Finally an excuse to shoot the Gladdy bathroom.
...To have friends that not only support you, but include you in their creative endeavours, fills one’s cup to the brim.
-bw